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Bite me

You can find lots of misbegotten instances of "Japanese English" over at sites like, so I know I'm not exactly breaking new comedic ground here. But two of the candies on sale at my local conbini (convenience store) are so remarkably unfortunate that they simply demand recognition.

First, why not eat some Asse:

Still hungry? Munch your way clear through to the Collon:

Collon scores bonus points for actually resembling a cross-section of colon. Bon Appetit!


Anonymous said...

Nice! Just the thing for Valentine's Day. I'd love to see some of our packaging / product names that crack up the Japanese as well.

I'll have to pick some up when I am in Japan later this year ... sure to amuse at parties! 

Posted by Sharon

Anonymous said...

I have seen a lot of people in the U.S. with tattoos of Japanese or Chinese writing on their bodies.

They are braver than me as I would never have something written on my body unless I knew exactly what the message meant, when it would be appropriate and when it would be inappropriate.

An unforeseen result may be that with the ravages of time on the human body, the message may change as dramatically as their bodies.


Posted by Don Poole

Anonymous said...

Being half-Japanese myself, my mom used to buy me this Japanese softdrink call "Calpis". I always thought she was saying "Cow Piss". Of course, she could never pronounce the "L", so it always sounded like "Cow". 

Posted by Steve

Anonymous said...

I've gotten to the point where I don't even think twice about taking a big gulp of Pocari Sweat after a workout.
By the way, there's a great site for mistaken Kanji tattoos. Make sure you're not drinking anything while browsing through their archives, unless you want to clean out your sinuses. 

Posted by Big Ben

Anonymous said...

Yes, the chocolate-filled "Collon" is one that stays in the mind; it was one of the first oddly-named eats I encountered here years ago. I've not yet seen "Asse" though. I'll have to be on the lookout.

As for the Hanzi Smatter, wonderful! Back in the mid-80s, I had a sweatshirt with kanji printed up the arms. A friend pointed out some were backwards, others upside-down. I've been wary since. 

Posted by Comrade_Tovarich



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